We all have enemies in life. If you don’t have any enemies, it’s a sign that you aren’t working hard enough. A worthy enemy can bring out the best in you. A worthy enemy will sharpen your EDGE. A worthy enemy will help you raise your standard.

At the same time, the wrong enemy can drain your energy. You could be spinning your wheels and not getting anywhere if you waste your energy fighting the wrong enemy.

To succeed, you need to be a fearless competitor. It requires emotion and logic. Sadly, some people lose their drive to compete when they become successful. When you started your business, you did it from a place of emotion. You had a drive within you to prove that you could make it. It wasn’t a logical decision, after all, 90% of businesses fail. When you find the right enemy, you’ll work harder. An enemy will create that emotion inside of you that will help you get to the next level.

The problem is you stop competing when you become successful. When you stop competing, you become complacent. You want everyone to “get along,” and you stop looking for enemies. You are no longer the game of life to win, you are only playing not to lose. When a man plays not to lose, he loses his EDGE At this point, you are relying on logic and lack emotion.

That’s when enemies come in handy. Your enemies will make you stronger. You have to find the right enemy. This is the subject of Patrick Bet-David’s new book, which I highly recommend. I created this list based on the book Choose Your Enemies Wisely.

How do you choose your enemies wisely?

1 – Find a mission that is worth fighting for
A lot of people have dreams and aspirations and a vision board, but they don’t have a mission. When you have a mission worth fighting for, it will help you find that drive. This is where you ask yourself, what is the legacy you want to create? What do you want to be remembered for? What do you want people to remember about you? What do you stand for?

When you start asking questions like that, you find your mission. What is the cause that is so big you are willing to get on the battlefield and fight and die for?

2- Get clear on who you must become to complete that mission
Most men don’t embark on a mission because they are too afraid to fail. They worry about just surviving. If you’re crazy enough to think you have a vision, you must become clear on who you have to become to make this vision a reality. This is where emotion drives you to become better. You tap into the fire inside of you that knows it’s better to die trying than stay on the sidelines.
Now you have clarity.

If your mission comes from a higher version of yourself, it will pull you. If you’re basing your vision on who you are right now, you’re playing too small, and that’s also why you don’t have any enemies. But if you create a vision based on a higher version of yourself, it will pull you to become better.

3- Who will be impacted by your mission?
Go deeper into your emotions. See who will be affected by your actions. If you take on this mission, who will benefit? Who will suffer if you quit? You want to find emotional leverage to keep you going when things get tough. Life is hard. Life will punch you in the face. In those moments, you must remember who you are, what you stand for, and who will suffer if you give up.

4- Make a list of what can get in your way
Actively look for what can stop you from achieving your mission. Are there any habits getting in the way? Are there any negative beliefs getting in your way? Are there any people who doubt you or may get in your way? Those things/people are your enemies.

5- Pick an enemy who will drive you and give you energy
An enemy can give you energy or waste your energy. Don’t waste your time with enemies who drain your energy. Not every enemy is worth your time and focus. Not every battle is worth fighting. Become strategic and choose enemies who will help you sharpen your EDGE. A worthy enemy will help you grow. The problem is that most men don’t want to pick an enemy who will drive them because they’re no longer playing the game to win. If you’re playing not to lose, you’re afraid to pick the right enemy.

A worthy enemy will unify your team. Now you can tell your team it’s us vs. them. They doubt us, they laugh at us, but because we’re on a mission, we are going to show them what’s possible. A worthy enemy will create the fire you need to figure out the strategy to win. You need that fire inside of you to figure things out. That is the only time you’re going to be able to use your enemy to get to the next level instead of having your enemy drain your energy.

But emotion is not enough. A worthy enemy will bring out your emotions, but you also need to have logic. You need to have the skills to fight the enemy. Otherwise, you’re going to lose. You need to have the skills – marketing, sales, systems, raising capital, etc.

Your will to win can lead you to create the skills to win. This is the pull and the push. The pull is the vision, the mission, the emotional connection to win. The push is the discipline necessary to continue to sharpen your skills and keep learning. Most men stop learning. They just want to be complacent. The push is to continue to be a student of the game. The push is to continue to drive forward and sharpen your EDGE every day.

My enemy is any negative force that stops me from completing my mission in life. My mission is to help men find their code to the EDGE so they can live with purpose and fulfill their destiny. I know their families are at risk if they don’t find the EDGE. Their employees are at risk if they don’t find the EDGE. Every day, I must face my enemy and commit to fighting another day. That emotion inside of me keeps me doing what I’m doing. I know exactly who I am and who I need to become to lead.

Most men don’t have a mission in life; they don’t have a vision of who they need to become. When I lost my EDGE, I lost that vision. I had enemies before, I knew who I needed to become. I once had a competitor in my real estate business send me a letter telling me I’d never make it. I read that letter every day. It drove me to succeed. I even bought her business from her. But once I was on top, I lost that EDGE. I started becoming complacent. When the market crashed, I became a victim of my circumstances.

To have the EDGE, you must balance emotion and logic. Find the enemy who will drive, you, but at the same time, have the push every day to execute. If you don’t face your enemy every day, you’re going to lose the battle. It’s your job every day to identify your enemy. When you get to the next level, find a new enemy. Be grateful that you can find these enemies who will push you to grow and expand.

Being a leader is not easy. Most days you will wake up with doubt, fear, and anxiety. The enemy is whispering in your ear that you’re not good enough. It’s up to you to listen to the higher version of yourself. Choose to tell the enemy, “Not today, mother fucker!”

Choose your enemies wisely. That will make the difference between being complacent, playing the game not to lose, or pushing yourself every day to sharpen your EDGE.