Author: Raul Villacis

On this episode of the podcast, Raul and Vivian discuss the 5 stages of a relationship, and the positive and negative feelings that you go through when you are in that stage: 

The infatuation stage is when you have that obsession, that neediness, that feeling that you can’t live without your partner. (Sometimes called “puppy love.”) A possible downside to this is that you become needy, and some relationships can’t survive if one partner is controlling and insecure. 

The honeymoon stage is when you don’t see anything wrong with your partner. You often overlook flaws in your partner, and unintentionally encourage unhealthy behavior by not being honest about your partner’s flaws. This can seem like the best time in a relationship, and couples often chase that feeling of the honeymoon stage, without realizing that the deeper love in the stages to follow is crucial to a long term relationship.  

The dissolution stage is also called the “reality check.” After overlooking your partner’s flaws in the honeymoon stage, you now acknowledge those flaws. It can be a real downer to have to confront the truth about your partner, and often your own disappointment is projected onto your partner. This is where your love is tested and you have to have the real and raw conversations.

The reevaluation stage is when you ask yourself if you’re going to be with this person for the rest of your life. It leads directly to the next stage (or doesn’t).

The commitment stage is where you go all in. You become aware of what you’re bringing into the relationship so that you can enhance each other’s lives. You want to grow old together, rather than chase the feeling of the beginning of a relationship. From that place, you can build a vision together.